Beavis
Note: due to its violent content, this pasta is NSFW. Discretion is advised. I was an intern at MTV in the late 1990s, just a year after the last episode of Beavis & Butt-Head aired. I was a biggest fan of the show, so I decided to look in the Beavis & Butt-Head video tapes. I looked in the episodes from the final season, and was surprised to found two tapes of the season finale “Beavis & Butt-Head are Dead”. One was the actual series finale, while the other had the tag “ORIGINAL” on it. Being a super duper fan, I decided to watch the original tape. It started just like any other Beavis & Butt-Head episode, with the opening theme and title card, which eventually cut to Beavis & Butt-Head on the couch watching TV. Nothing out of the ordinary at first. At first. The TV showed news footage of the 9/11 attacks, which actually frightens me much more now thinking about it, since that really happened and stuff just a few years later. “H-huh huh, terrorists are cool…” Butt-Head said, “Hey Beavisth, maybe we can get some of those guys to do that to our school.” “Heh-heh-heh,” Beavis replied, “Planes get tons of chicks. And we’d totally score after that. B-boi-oi-oi-oi-oi-oing!” I know, I was shocked that they went there too. Beavis & Butt-Head were known for having episodes that MTV pulled from their network after only one or two airings for content, but this was shocking. Beavis was also playing with an army knife, trying to strike it between his fingers. Butt-Head called out, “Ohhhhhh! Look Beavisth, check it out! They’re gonna cut this dude’s head off!” and jabbed Beavis on the shoulder. This threw Beavis off, and he accidentally stabbed himself in the wrist. Hyper-realistic blood spurted everywhere, and he screamed loudly. “Uh-huh-huh Beavisth, your arm is on its period.” “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGHHHH! FUCK YOU, BUTT-HEAD!” Beavis and Butt-Head have never been allowed to say that word on MTV. And it was uncensored too. Beavis’s arm continued to gush blood, but his scream started to get more and more blood-curdling. “Dammit Beavisth, shut up! I’m trying to watch this!” Butt-Head said, as the TV showed a video of an ISIS beheading. “GET HELP, BUTT-HEAD, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!” Beavis was covered in his own blood, and what skin of his that wasn’t drenched of blood was turning pale white. “Huh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh… That’s cool...” “AAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUHHH!” Beavis tried to get up, but he was getting too dizzy and weak. He was pissed that Butt-Head wasn’t going to help him, and holding his knife in his other hand, stabbed Butt-Head in the stomach. “OWWW! BEAVISTH YOU DUMBASSTH! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT FOR? BEAVISTH! DAMMIT BEAVISTH, ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?!” “Uuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhh…” Beavis weakly moaned, before he collapsed on the floor, fainted, and died. “Beavisth, you piece of shit. Are you like, dead? Uh-huh-huh-huh that’s cool… OHHHHH my stomach hurts… My butt hurts too, uh-huh-huh…” Butt-Head started laughing and screaming more while he too bled profusely and started to get covered in his own hyper-realistic blood, only his laughing and screaming both started to get extra demonic. After 13 seconds, Butt-Head fell over dead too. The screen then showed a “6 MONTHS LATER” card, and cut to Beavis and Butt-Head’s pale and bloodied dead bodies rotting and decomposing on the floor right in front of their couch. I still get sick inside recalling that image in my head, even after almost twenty years later. The screen faded away to black, and that was the end of the episode. It was only a few minutes long, with no music videos and no credits. I was stunned and speechless. This abomination of an original series finale has been kept under wraps by Mike Judge and MTV for twenty years, and they believe no one else beside them has ever seen or heard of it; they have no idea I had even seen it. I quit my internship the next day and didn’t say why, so I don’t know if the tape is still out there or if they destroyed it since I left. If you ever manage to find the tape, save your sanity and emotional stability and NEVER WATCH THAT THING I’M SERIOUS!!!!!!!!111!1 Category:Lost episudes